But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
id be glad to
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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