I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
