I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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