I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Found your dick twin last night
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
