some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ATM looks so different sober.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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