you're like a bully in the Christmas story
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
You are the jesus of drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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