So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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