if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Randomize
