Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
