problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
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Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
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She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
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