Welp...herpes.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
