she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
