He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
