Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
She said her name was "party"
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
