why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
