well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
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I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
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There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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