btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
