there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
