I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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