i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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