The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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