I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
