We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
