Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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