you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
