i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
