playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
