I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
