Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I cockslap morals
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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