Plan B is the new Plan A
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Randomize
