Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
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