she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
