we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
