I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
