I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
