I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Randomize
