I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I still have a little drunk in my system
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
