the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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