in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Randomize
