Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
