I'd wear matching sweaters with you
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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