The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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