i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
In America we eat man semen.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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