the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
