I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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