hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
