And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
