Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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