I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
he was CRYING into my vagina
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
