If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize