So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
