is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
